There was a time when I believed positivity was something that simply happened to a handful of lucky people. I thought some folks naturally saw the bright side while others were wired differently. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve realized something much more powerful.
Positivity is a choice.
It isn’t a choice we make once. It’s a choice we make every single day.
As a mom, a musician, and someone who has experienced both wonderful victories and difficult disappointments, I’ve learned that life gives us plenty of reasons to become discouraged. We all experience setbacks. We all encounter criticism. We all face seasons when things don’t go according to plan.
The question isn’t whether those moments will come. The question is how we’ll respond when they do.
I’ve decided to live by what I think of as the laws of positivity.
I Choose What Gets My Attention
Our world is louder than ever. News feeds, social media, and endless opinions compete for our attention every day. It’s easy to spend hours focusing on everything that’s wrong with the world.
But I’ve discovered that whatever I feed grows.
If I feed fear, fear grows. If I feed resentment, resentment grows. If I feed hope, gratitude, and encouragement, those begin to shape my outlook instead.
That doesn’t mean I ignore reality. It simply means I refuse to let negativity become the loudest voice in my life.
Kindness Is Never Wasted
One lesson music has taught me is that people remember how you make them feel.
I’ve performed for audiences of every size, and while I certainly hope people remember the songs, I also hope they remember how they felt while we shared those moments together. Connection lasts longer than perfection.
The same is true away from the stage.
A smile. An encouraging conversation. A compliment. A moment of patience. Those things may seem small, but I’ve seen how deeply they can affect someone. We rarely know what another person is carrying, which is why kindness remains one of the greatest gifts we can offer.
Optimism Is Not Denial
Sometimes people confuse positivity with pretending everything is perfect. That’s never been my approach.
Optimism doesn’t ignore challenges. It simply believes challenges don’t get the final word.
Some of my favorite songs have come from difficult experiences. Some of my greatest lessons arrived through seasons I never would have chosen. Looking back, I can see that those moments shaped my character, strengthened my faith, and reminded me how resilient people can be.
I’ve learned that hope and honesty can exist together.
Our Children Are Watching
One of the biggest reasons I try to live this way is because my kids are always learning from what I do. They notice how I respond when plans change. They hear the words I use when life gets difficult. They watch how I treat strangers and how I speak about other people.
More than anything, I want them to see that positivity is not about having an easy life. It’s about choosing grace, gratitude, and perspective when life becomes difficult.
Those habits don’t develop overnight. They grow through small choices repeated over time.
The World Needs More Light
As musicians, we have the privilege of putting something into the world that didn’t exist before. As parents, we have the privilege of helping shape the next generation. As neighbors, friends, and fellow human beings, we have opportunities every day to leave people better than we found them.
That responsibility inspires me.
I don’t believe positivity changes the world because it makes life easier. I believe it changes the world because it changes people. Encouragement creates confidence. Kindness creates connection. Hope creates resilience.
I’ve seen those things happen in my own life, and I’ve watched them happen in the lives of others.
That’s why I’ll continue choosing optimism, even when cynicism feels easier. I’ll continue looking for reasons to encourage people, celebrate small victories, and believe that good things are still possible.
Because positivity isn’t simply part of my personality.
It’s the way I’ve chosen to live.
The Music Mom: Eileen Carey 